The worst thing you can do today (Good Friday) is—pretend it matters to you more than it does.
For years I walked into a sanctuary with my body on Good Friday, but my heart was numb and disconnected.
I WANTED to feel something, but I didn’t. I wanted to cry. I wanted to feel grieved. I wanted to be moved. But I wasn’t and I felt guilty about it. In an effort to make the day matter to me, I pretended. I tried to feel something I didn’t feel. This act alone pulled me further away from the cross.
Today, go to church. If you are able, go. And when you walk in to the dim lit room, be honest. Be honest with yourself, others, God. Speak the truth.
Here is the most beautiful part about confession, it draws you closer to the cross.
You may not feel anything today. You may not be sad or amazed or overwhelmed. Your feelings are not an indicator of if you care or not.
Your feeling are a gift.
They provide secret passage into your hidden heart. Your hidden heart is the abiding place of God.
When you are honest (no matter what the content of you honesty may be) you are moving into true relationship with God. You are touching the cross. You are touched by it. God touching man. Man touching God. The cross is the intersection of good and evil. Jesus, arm in arm, bridging the gap.
Today is Good Friday. You don’t have to pretend it matters more to you than it does.
Perhaps one of the greatest gifts God offers you today is to be honest. This is what the cross does—it begs you to come as you are—bored, broken, burdened, and bare.
Just come.
Thank you Anjuli! You speak truth! Glad I can come just as I am. Complex and loved and longing!
Thank you